Well, I’m big enough to admit when I’m wrong. I was counting on the Braves to win Game 7 against the Dodgers this week so I could write this big piece on all of the mascots they’ve ever had because I think some of them are super interesting. The Braves lost. They choked, and I choked, because I didn’t have a back up article ready. I put all of my eggs this week in the Braves’ basket. They took that basket, and threw all of the eggs at each other and myself. And by that, I mean to say: We all have a little egg on our face this week. 

But enough with the egg malaphors, I’m talking about the Braves this week, whether they deserve it or not. 

The Braves have had what I would describe as an unusually high number of mascots since their founding. I don’t know if I would describe any of them as ‘good,’ but their history is more interesting than most. 

(As a quick aside, I’m going to be upfront about this: It gets very racist, very quickly. If that makes you uncomfortable, skip to the Braves Bleacher Creature, Rally and Blooper. If you’re interested in hearing more about racial mascot controversy, keep an eye on this column around Thanksgiving, where I’ll be talking about the subject in-depth.)

Chief Noc-A-Homa

So let’s start with the very first and the very worst: Chief Noc-A-Homa. He was a Native American stereotype live mascot played by a white guy whose name was supposed to resemble the phrase “Knock a homer.” It all started with someone dancing around a teepee that someone put in the centerfield bleachers in the 60s. Even though he was played by a real Native American man from ‘69 to ‘86, I shouldn’t have to say how gross it is to base your mascot on a racial stereotype. 

Braves Bleacher Creature

I think this one is my favorite out of all of the Braves Mascots. The Braves Bleacher Creature was this walking green carpet with big red eyes and a baseball cap with a Braves logo on it. It also had a permanent toothless smile. I’ve also read that because the mascot costume was exceptionally furry, it was hot, and that also gave it a bizarre smell. It was awful, and I love it. If anyone from the Braves PR team is reading, bring back the Bleacher Creature. It would rival Gritty in the “Meme-y mascot department” I’m telling you. 

Rally

Rally is like the Atlantis of the Atlanta Braves mascots. Not much is known about him, but he was apparently wildly popular among Braves fans. He came in just after the retirement of the Braves first mascot. Rally wasn’t racist, which makes him better automatically, and he’s pretty cute, too. He’s also like Atlantis in that he had a mysterious disappearance. He was introduced in 1986, and then around 2004-2005, he disappeared, and I was unable to find any official Braves documentation on the matter. Will we ever find out what happened to Rally? Or will it forever remain a mystery?

Homer

Homer is all over the place. First, he was “Homer the Brave,” and he had a costumed head that resembled a caricature of the old “Screaming Warrior” Logo that the Braves used to use. Thankfully, in 1988, Homer’s head was replaced with a baseball, a la Mr. Met a la Mr. Red. It wasn’t original, but at least it wasn’t racist. Homer’s main designs were boring, but I’ve seen shots from his early days when he had eyes that made him look like he was in a constant state of trying not to pee. 

Blooper

I don’t know, Blooper is fine, I suppose? He has a very alien look to him, but what bothers me about that is that his skin is tan? It makes him boring to look at. It’s like if the person who designed doctor’s offices decided to design a mascot. Make his skin green, purple, add spots! But beige? It’s boring. Regardless, Blooper makes me think of another very similar mascot, Slider, of the Cleveland Indians. Both of these teams are based on a racial stereotype surrounding Native Americans. In order to draw attention away from that, both teams made a hard 90 degree turn in the direction of a mascot that was innocuous and incapable of being politically interpreted in any way. 

Well, there you have it. I wanted to talk about the Braves, because not only is their cast of characters very unique and varied in quality, but they’re super interesting because most of these mascots overlapped with each other at some point. The Bleacher Creature was around during Rally’s time as well as during the time of some of the other mascots. If you ask me, I think the Braves should have changed their name entirely when they switched to the baseball-headed Homer in order to distance themselves even from the racially connected origin of their name, but I’ll get back to you guys on that one around Thanksgiving.