Ranking the best and worst Halloween candies
October 7, 2020
Not all typical Halloween candies are created equal. So here is a definitive ranking of the best, most mediocre and worst candies available during Halloween.
The top three on the list just taste better during Halloween. There’s no rhyme or reason here, they just do.
1- Reese’s cups (specifically the pumpkins): This is the only acceptable answer for first place. Reese cups are just better when they’re shaped like pumpkins.
2- Twix: I feel like I don’t need to explain this one. Twix are always great, but they taste different on Halloween.
3- Kit Kats: Specifically the full-size with the decorated wrappers.
The next three are in the middle of the list because they’re generally hit or miss, but when they hit, they HIT. They are specific to Halloween because of the flavors.
4- Candy corn M&Ms: These do not taste like candy corn even a little bit, but I think that makes it better. They’re candy corn colored and have white chocolate on the inside.
5- Candy corn Hershey’s: Again, these do not taste like candy corn.
6- Pumpkin spice Hershey Kisses: Seasonal Hershey Kisses are always the best, and if you’re a pumpkin spice lover, these are perfect for you.
These last few are okay, just not the best or the worst.
7- 3 Musketeers
8- Milky Way
9- Snickers
Now, some honorable mentions are Twizzlers, M&Ms, Butterfingers and Crunch bars. These are fine on their own and they’re fun to receive on Halloween, but they taste the same no matter what the holiday is.
Now, I’m sure you’re thinking that there’s something missing from this list. Candy corn — THE Halloween candy. I included candy corn flavored candy on this list, so where does actual candy corn fall?
It comes in last place. After all of it. After the honorable mentions, even. Candy corn is gross. It is barely flavored wax and I genuinely believe it does not deserve to be called a candy.
Don’t get me wrong — I love using it as decoration and the colors are very cute for fall. But the taste and consistency of candy corn is inedible. Come to think of it, I’ve never even actually received candy corn while I’ve been trick-or-treating.
This is the optimal list for the Halloween season. Hopefully your October is filled with Reese’s Pumpkins and very little candy corn.
Sarah Gibson • Oct 8, 2020 at 1:16 pm
Dear Tia,
Okay so I disagree with your candy corn take– it’s delicious and I can’t be convinced otherwise– I ADORE your voice in these fun pieces. Lovely!