Five things the liberal media won’t tell you

A step-by-step guide to accepting alternative facts

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Five things the liberal media won’t tell you

Written By Lauren Ortego, Co-Copy Desk Chief

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In the wake of Donald Trump becoming the President of the United States, there’s been a lot of talk about “fake news,” and I’m here to help you discern for yourself what is fake and what is real.

Firstly, was it printed or written by a publication that often does not fit in with your values? If so, it’s possible that you have stumbled upon a fabricated story.

Don’t bother searching the internet to check the sources cited for credibility or research provided – it’s probably fake. You always had a fishy feeling about that website anyways.

Second, does it sounds like something wild and unbelievable? Something that is likely to have never happened, but feeds your interest and would make a great conversation starter on that date you’ve been nervous about going on?

If yes, then it’s probably true. The world is so unpredictable nowadays, you never know what to believe. Except for that. Definitely believe that.

Man, your date is going to love it so much they’ll probably ask you to marry them right on the spot.

Third, does it come from your weird uncle who always smells like beer’s Facebook feed? He’s pretty wise, and he’s always watching TV, so it’s most definitely true.

This is probably the easiest way to tell if something is true. Every time he posts something from FreedomEagle.LiberalsAreStupid.com, it’s almost a 100 percent guarantee of holding nothing but pure facts.

Pay close attention to what he shares for all your credible news needs.

Fourth, did your one smart co-worker bring it up while having awkward small talk in the middle of the day? He’s a genius. I mean, he wears glasses and he has one of those little pocket protectors, and I’m pretty sure I read somewhere that those are guaranteed to only be worn by the most intelligent people.

Plus, since he’s so smart, he probably researched it himself, so he’s a pretty reliable source.

Now, pay very close attention to this fifth one: did Trump tweet it? Something tweeted by Trump, who is, by the way, the most trustworthy of all available sources on the internet, is always factually researched and reasonable.

Otherwise, why would his staff and advisors let him tweet it? Ignore the fact that PolitiFact, a “credible” website run by allegedly “experienced” journalists and editors who fact-check statements by politicians, said that approximately 96 percent of all of his statements contain some type of falsity.

In all seriousness, journalism and the reporting of unbiased facts as it has been known is changing.

Words like “alternative facts” are being used by those in power, organizations are getting in trouble for tweeting accurate statements and the president is surrounding himself with self-indulgent media outlets filled with propaganda and bias.

It’s important to note that just because something aligns with what we want to believe doesn’t necessarily make it true.

Check news sources, check for credibility, read multiple accounts of the same stories, but most importantly: don’t spread something you know has the potential to be false or is false.

Except for satire. Always share satire.

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