Point Park Globe

A coffee paper holder from Point Perk | Photo by Jake Dabkowski

Judging Java: Shops that “Proudly Serve Starbucks Coffee”

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Editor-in-Chief February 1, 2023

Stop saying that you proudly serve Starbucks Coffee. You don’t. Almost anytime I get coffee from a coffee shop that “proudly” serves Starbucks coffee, it is just a worse version of Starbucks. This...

Judging Java: Pistachio Latte

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist January 25, 2023

Starbucks Coffee constantly introduces limited-time themed drinks, as a means of marketing. This “fear of missing out” style drink first began with the Pumpkin Spice Latte in the early 2000s, and the...

Judging Java: Round Table

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Editor-in-Chief January 18, 2023

One thing that I find incredibly frustrating about many coffee shops is volume. Many coffee shops, especially coffee shops that double as eateries, are entirely too loud. A coffee shop should be chill,...

Judging Java: The City of Philadelphia

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist January 11, 2023

The city of Philadelphia. What more do I have to say? A lot, actually. The city of Philadelphia has the same vibe as the Mos Eisley Spaceport. Many would describe it as a wretched hive of scum and villainy....

Judging Java Holiday Spectacular: Bring joy to your joe

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist December 7, 2022

Ho! Ho! Ho! It’s a holly-jolly Judging Java spectacular. Typically, I write the last column of each semester as a reflection on the semester as a whole and giving this one a special holiday tie-in is...

Judging Java: International Delight Iced Oreo Coffee

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist November 16, 2022

A classic late night misadventure with a good friend brought me into contact with the worst coffee I have ever tasted in my entire life. We had just gotten out of an opening night screening of Black...

Judging Java: First Watch

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist November 10, 2022

Recently, I ate breakfast. I eat breakfast every day, but what I mean is that recently I ate breakfast. Typically my breakfasts consist of either an oatmeal, some eggs, or bowl of the greatest cereal of...

Judging Java | Oat milk in coffee: it will change your life forever

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist November 3, 2022

My life changed forever recently. It was a somber Sunday morning when I began craving a nice cup of coffee. As I made the coffee, I debated what to put in it. Sometimes I drink my coffee without anything...

Judging Java: Dunkin Donuts Pumpkin Spice Latte

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist October 19, 2022

Fall brings many things. The leaves change colors, people start wearing sweaters, seasonal depression starts, and the Pumpkin Spice Latte returns. I already revisited Starbucks’ Pumpkin Spice Latte this...

Judging Java: Yinz Coffee

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist October 12, 2022

Oxford Dictionary defines yinz as “(in western Pennsylvania) you (used to refer to more than one person).” It gives the example of “how yinz guys doing?” I identify as a Pittsburgher. I was...

Judging Java: Whole Foods Coffee Bar

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist October 5, 2022

Whole Foods is a company that is owned by Amazon. I do not like Amazon. I do not think that very many people my age like Amazon. I think that Jeff Bezos is one of the worst people alive, and that in a...

Judging Java: Point Perk Revisited

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist September 28, 2022
Two years ago, I wrote that “Point Perk’s coffee is so awful that it wouldn’t surprise me if it emerged as a frontrunner in the 2024 Republican primaries.” At the time of reviewing Point Perk, our university’s coffee shop, my one star out of five review was one of the most scathing reviews I had ever written.
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