How do I handle criticism? What is the difference between constructive and nonconstructive criticism? How can someone create something rooted in hate? How can I deal with rumors being spread about me? How do I handle someone harassing me? How do I handle fear? Is it possible to help someone from an uncontrollable situation?
Good questions. It is sad that this week’s questions stem from a place of hate, but the world has been full of a lot of hate lately. I personally have faced hate myself from someone who I don’t know in my submission form. I know the messages can be hurtful, but you can not take the opinions of others to heart. Often, people who do not really know you are the ones to drag your name through the mud. However, those who hurt others often hurt themselves, and I may not know what I did to hurt this anonymous person. Nevertheless, I am sorry my actions led to someone’s pain.
Handling criticism can be hard, but in an arts school it is important to remember most of the valid, constructive criticism on your work is meant to push you harder to do the best you can. If you do not feel challenged, then you are not going to improve. Differentiating between both is pretty simple: If something is being said about something you can change or grow in, then it’s constructive. But if it is talking about things you cannot change, then it’s not constructive.
A person who says something hateful is often a person who is affected by hate themselves. I know it is hard to deal with hateful things being put into the world about you, but the most important thing is to know that the people you love know the truth. Unfortunately, no matter who you are, people will spread lies about you, and it’s important to focus on the truth. If you waste too much energy trying to debunk an obvious lie, the more people may end up believing the lie.
Harassment can be bad. Sometimes it is meaningless, but at other times it can be beyond dangerous. I have dealt with and am dealing with harassment and each time I have handled it differently. One thing I have always made sure to do is to inform someone in a position of power; it’s best not to deal with things alone.
Fear is something innate in the human body. It’s a way of helping keep us safe. The only thing I know about fear is that sometimes you have to face it and prove you are stronger than it.
Helping the people you love is one of the most common desires, but in a situation where you have no control it can be extremely hard. You cannot let the pain they are feeling take too much of a toll on you, otherwise you will not be able to help. In times like these, one of the best things you can do for someone is to be there for them. Just be an ear to listen to and a hand to hold. Sometimes, all people need is empathy.
Do you need some advice? Are people in your life too indecisive?
Do you need a new point of view?
Just email me at [email protected].
