Is lying to protect a friend a bad decision? How can you differentiate between a damaging lie and a white lie? How far is too far when lying? Is it possible to go back on a lie and not get in trouble? Is telling someone a hurtful truth avoidable? How bad is it to make a decision for someone else? How are you supposed to let people get hurt with the truth?

Great questions like usual. It is definitely hard to deal with someone you love getting hurt. But lying has never been the best option in any situation. The best thing a person can do is be honest about what’s going on.

Protecting friends is a very admirable goal, but lying can cause a rift between a friendship. If the relationship is very important, then you should try to avoid doing anything that can jeopardize it.

The differentiation between a damaging lie and white lie is not a decipherable equation; all things depend on the situation. I personally find white lies to be lies that have zero way of harming someone. The only time I find myself lying anymore is when I play games designed around the premise of concealing the truth and convincing people you are being honest.

Lying becomes a problem the minute you are hurting someone. Once you lie, there is no way to go back on it. Even if you tell the truth later, lying makes you unreliable. There comes a point when you realize, no matter what you say, you can not make up for the pain you cause. Instead of lying your way to that point, try to focus on being honest.

The statement that the truth always comes out is false; there are many unsolvable mysteries out in the world. So, telling you that the truth is unavoidable would be a lie. I will say that, just because the truth does not come out, it does not stop people from being hurt by the lie.

In the nicest way possible, I want to say you have no right to dictate another person’s decisions. We can not act as if we are some higher power to make decisions or control another person’s life.

It is understandable to want to help, but attempting to take control only takes away from someone else’s free will. It is hard to sit back and watch someone get hurt. The best thing you can do is to trust that the person is strong enough to handle the hard truth. If they are not, then you have to be there to hold their hand through the hard times.

Do you need some advice? Are people in your life too indecisive? 

Do you need a new point of view?

Just email me at [email protected].