Point Park Globe

A coffee paper holder from Point Perk | Photo by Jake Dabkowski

Judging Java: Shops that “Proudly Serve Starbucks Coffee”

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Editor-in-Chief February 1, 2023

Stop saying that you proudly serve Starbucks Coffee. You don’t. Almost anytime I get coffee from a coffee shop that “proudly” serves Starbucks coffee, it is just a worse version of Starbucks. This...

Judging Java: Round Table

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Editor-in-Chief January 18, 2023

One thing that I find incredibly frustrating about many coffee shops is volume. Many coffee shops, especially coffee shops that double as eateries, are entirely too loud. A coffee shop should be chill,...

Judging Java: First Watch

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist November 10, 2022

Recently, I ate breakfast. I eat breakfast every day, but what I mean is that recently I ate breakfast. Typically my breakfasts consist of either an oatmeal, some eggs, or bowl of the greatest cereal of...

Judging Java: Dunkin Donuts Pumpkin Spice Latte

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist October 19, 2022

Fall brings many things. The leaves change colors, people start wearing sweaters, seasonal depression starts, and the Pumpkin Spice Latte returns. I already revisited Starbucks’ Pumpkin Spice Latte this...

Judging Java: Yinz Coffee

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist October 12, 2022

Oxford Dictionary defines yinz as “(in western Pennsylvania) you (used to refer to more than one person).” It gives the example of “how yinz guys doing?” I identify as a Pittsburgher. I was...

Judging Java: Whole Foods Coffee Bar

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist October 5, 2022

Whole Foods is a company that is owned by Amazon. I do not like Amazon. I do not think that very many people my age like Amazon. I think that Jeff Bezos is one of the worst people alive, and that in a...

Judging Java: Point Perk Revisited

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist September 28, 2022
Two years ago, I wrote that “Point Perk’s coffee is so awful that it wouldn’t surprise me if it emerged as a frontrunner in the 2024 Republican primaries.” At the time of reviewing Point Perk, our university’s coffee shop, my one star out of five review was one of the most scathing reviews I had ever written.

Judging Java: Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist September 14, 2022
Few things are as inescapable as time. No matter how hard you fight it, no matter how hard you deny it, time is going to pass. People will grow older, presidents will be replaced, new blockbuster film franchises will overtake old ones. The leaves will always change with the seasons and then fall. The roaring cold of winter will always overtake the brisk autumn, only to be replaced by the breath of springtime and the radiance of summer. 

Judging Java: Reflections on a Junior Year

Written By Jake Dabkowski, Coffee Columnist April 19, 2022
As is tradition for this column at the end of a semester, I will be taking this space to offer reflections on the past semester as opposed to reviewing a coffee shop. I am, however, still writing this in a coffee shop (Delanie’s on Carson Street, for those curious), so it does still count.
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