This past week officially marked mid-terms for conservatory students. Whether you are a freshman receiving your first collegiate grade reports or an upperclassman feeling uneasy in one-on-one check ins, these feelings are valid. It can be uncomfortable to receive direct critiques on your capabilities as an artist.
What’s worse? Hearing that a close friend got an “A” in ballet, and you received a “B,” though you have the same worth ethic. Or maybe a peer discussed enlightening feedback with a professor, while you felt the opposite. There’s a subtle competitive energy that lies within the arts, and it’s inevitable that students face it.
When experiencing this, it’s easy to place blame on yourself, your peers or even professors. Feelings of self-hatred or frustration may internally arise. Perhaps you hold a personal vendetta toward a friend, as you feel deserving of what they receive. You may even lose respect in a class you have to continue to attend.
Avoiding this spiral is vital, but comes with time. I continue to struggle with grades, even as a sophomore. I expend my energy all day toward being prepared and consistent in class, seeking my professors’ validation. This mentality, though, is what needs to change.
You must show up everyday for yourself and your improvement only. Creating an overly performative environment to please one individual’s opinion on your art defeats the purpose of your educational pursuits. You should believe that you have nothing to prove, only everything to gain.
Do not cross a line, though, by creating a superiority complex towards your professors. Every single Point Park faculty member is incredibly renowned and has impressive and useful information to share. Therefore, a balance of respect for their expertise and trust in your individuality allows true growth to occur.
In terms of comparing grades with friends, it’s easy to resent people you should admire. When approaching this, I find it most helpful to recognize that art is subjective. What one professor values in a student’s work another may not. This does not diminish the value of what you have produced.
Lastly, it’s important to stay true to yourself. Not every critique will feel fair, and not every accomplishment will be valued. Regardless, the most successful artist remains grounded and open to feedback and corrections. After all, that’s why you are here, majoring in your art.
