How can I tell if someone is interested in me? Should I tell my friend that I have romantic feelings for them? How do I differentiate what kind of relationship I have with someone? How can I make myself more compatible? How can I be more comfortable being alone?
Wonderful questions as usual. I am not an expert in relationships, so bear with me. First thing I need to address going into a conversation about relationships is your relationship with yourself.
You can not love someone without loving yourself first. You are not going to always be confident in your looks or secure with your personality, but as long as you know your worth it will be ok. We are all human and we all struggle with self love. Acknowledging this while not letting it bring you down is very helpful.
One thing we often overlook is quality alone time because our schedules may be too busy, but prioritizing your alone time is very important. Making sure you can sit in a room by yourself and enjoy your own company is paramount to being able to be in a relationship. The best thing I can suggest for building more of a comfort with yourself is to push for more alone time. Find things that you enjoy that you can do alone.
In regard to detecting someone else’s interest, it is not always clear and everyone has different love languages that sometimes affect how they display their interest. The biggest issue with trying to start a relationship is going into it blind. Be up front at the start. The best way to figure out if someone is interested in you is by just being honest. Tell them how you feel or ask them out.
Dating is not a game you should not play with another person. The best kind of relationships are ones formed from trust and connections, rather than relationships formed from physical interest or loneliness. Paying attention to people’s actions and words will keep you from fabricating a relationship that may not be desired.
When it comes to telling a friend you have developed feelings outside of an already established connection, it’s a hard thing to navigate. Some people say to ignore it and let it go away. Others say to try and test to see if they are in a further developed relationship. I will say they are wrong, if this is a relationship you value and a connection that you feel is developing, then you need to be honest.
Have a sit down conversation with this friend and see how they value the relationship and where they see it going. Express where you are at and what you desire. If you both share the desire, great. If not, continue talking about what you both want and how you can make some kind of relationship work. Telling them may make it awkward, but if the relationship is really deep and important to both of you, you can get through that.
Lastly, I have said it before and I will say it forever: do not change yourself for someone else. If a person does not like who you naturally are, they will never like you. Be happy with the person you are, and the right person will come along. It just takes time.
