Why do I feel alone even around my friends? How do I make myself happy? Why am I not able to be happy like other people? When do I know if my mental health is detrimental to my safety? What do I do when someone is harassing me? What do I do if I believe what others say about me? How do I know who to go to for help? How do I deal with people I cannot rely on?
These are amazing questions, but I just want to give you all a hug. I am so grateful to everyone who sends the questions in, but I want you to make sure that you are seeking help for your mental health.
When it comes to the feeling of loneliness, there are many potential causes. The first thing to do is to find out if the problem is most present with your friends. If it is, then you should sit down and have a discussion. No matter how many times the question gets asked, I will always say communication is the most important pillar of a healthy relationship. If you cannot clearly communicate your needs with your friends, then they cannot meet them. However, if you do communicate your needs and they ignore them, then it raises the question of why you are friends with these people.
Happiness varies by person and there is no one set plan to be happy. We cannot compare our lives to others on social media — almost everyone wants something other people have. Letting that mentality take over will only push you further from your goal of joy. Living in the moment and chasing the experiences you want is the only way to live your own life. Do not try to live someone else’s life.
When you let others control your life, you lose the mental awareness of your own mental health. Your mental health impacts everything in your life, it changes your outward presentation. Typical signs of poor mental wellness consist of poor appetite, lack of motivation, and constantly comparing oneself to others. One big effect on your mental health is how you deal with the problems around you.
If someone is harassing you, you cannot just let it continue. Pushing it off or brushing it away will not do anything to help you be happy. You need to address the issue, and the only way to be problem-free is to combat the problem. You will never be able to look at yourself through someone else’s eyes, so stop attempting to. Your view is far prettier anyway.
Knowing where to go is the same as knowing who to go to. There are plenty of people around campus that are here to help you, and the first person you should go to is your RE. They may not always be able to help you immediately, but they can make sure you are safe. The only thing holding you back from being happy is yourself. If you do not cause problems to get rid of the bigger problem, you will not be able to be happy. If you push yourself to conflict, you can push yourself past it. College is important, but this is not the end of your road. Remember everything here, but your grades are not the only thing important at the moment.
Do you need some advice? Are people in your life too indecisive?
Do you need a new point of view?
Just email me at [email protected]
